Dating Women Advice: Why Did Katie Holmes Lose Interest In Tom Cruise?

YOU CAN'T FIX CRAZY!

​So, she was a WHACK-JOB and all his effort was for NOTHING because there was nothing he could do with someone that was never going to be able to give him a normal relationship.

Read the article below but first we have some audio extras for you:

Dating Women Podcast #103 & #104

103:  His girlfriend broke a date to go out with a friend?  A male one???
104:  He's thinking of marriage after only 5 months?  What?! 

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READER'S QUESTION

Hey Doc,

Trying to figure out what went wrong here.

I haven’t read “The System” (yet!), but I think I did most of what you recommend in your columns. I’m 49 and met a gorgeous 40-year-old Russian, Gal, a year ago. We hit it off from the first date. There was physical and personality chemistry. I played it cool, mainly because I had a few other babes also of interest to me. I only saw her once a week, and never chatted or texted in between. I have three little kids, so they take up half my time anyway.

Six weeks into it, Gal had a crisis about us: that maybe we don’t have an emotional connection. She ran off and went silent for a couple weeks. I texted her that she left her watch at my house, so we agreed that I’d come over and drop it off. We went on a long walk where she went on about how she gets scared and this and that. Okay, I said, don’t worry so much, and we resumed dating for another six weeks. Then she told me that she is struggling with what to do with her life and thinks she wants to have another kid (she has a grown son), to which I said I’m not having any more kids. She ran off again and I said to myself, okay, who’s next?

I didn’t hear from Gal again for eight months. Then we got matched up on a dating app by coincidence, struck up a conversation, and met again. I tried to play it cool, but for some reason now I’m WAY more into her than I was last year. She didn’t seem as crazy as she did the first time around. We start dating once a week again. After five weeks, she flaked on me AGAIN via text after we had planned a date, and implied by her text that she was going back to an ex. I tried to act indifferent even though this time I’m feeling crushed inside.

She texted me a week later to get together to talk because she felt like a coward for not telling me in person and breaking our plans at the last minute. When we met, she could hardly get any words out. She muttered something to the effect of feeling like she was getting emotionally attached to me and it was freaking her out.

From that I gathered that she is having some sort of midlife crisis, and maybe it’s good riddance. Then I walked away. But I’ve been lamenting the breakup since then -- not that I had any control over it. But the sex was great, the rapport was witty, and we had fun dates. It seemed like her Interest Level was high whenever I’d ask her out. Now I’m going through withdrawal: no sleep, no appetite, feeling rejected. I know it will pass, but it’s made me wonder, even if you do all the “right things” in dating, what are the reasons that she’ll STILL lose interest in you?

Herbie - who thought he had it all figured out


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DOC LOVE'S ANSWER

Hi Herbie,

You might have done everything I recommend in my columns, but without “The System,” YOU DIDN’T DO IT ALL. You need to OWN and MEMORIZE my book in order to avoid errors in dating and maximize its power. Now you’re calling me with a problem. You say you don’t have my book yet. What do you mean, yet? It takes all of 45 seconds to order it and you can have it immediately if you order a download of the electronic version of the book or the audio! What are you waiting for, guy, more trouble and anguish?

Now let me get this straight. You have three kids by another woman and now you think you’re going to date Gal and not make the same mistakes you made with the mother of your children? But when you mention “The System,” all you talk about is yet!

When Gal disappeared on you, it meant she dumped you. It meant you were OUT. What she should have told you when you resumed dating was, “Herbie, you’re going out with a nut-case!”

These articles give you a lot - but not enough - you need THE SYSTEM if you really want to be successful with women. Not sure? Read our "you changed my life letters."

You might be more into Gal now than you were before, but if you’d had my book from the beginning, you would have realized that the only thing that counts is having a clinically sane woman. And dude, you don’t have one here. This babe is loaded with scars and baggage. Finally, you still haven’t gotten “The System,” so there’s no hope that you’ll know what to do when you see RED FLAGS. I don’t understand how you can read all of my columns, agree with everything I say, but when it comes to getting my book, all you have to say is yet.

Dude, I have news for you – all women who break dates break them at the last minute. On the other hand, men don’t break dates – but that’s never brought up in Cosmopolitan or Glamour magazine.

You say the sex was great and you had rapport and fun on your dates with Gal, but look at all of the hell you endured between the dates. Look at all of the inconsistent behavior she displayed. Like my Uncle Jethro Love says, “This woman is an erratic yo-yo!” If her Interest Level was so high, she wouldn’t be breaking dates with you, Herbie. And she would have been consistent in her behavior. See, this is why you’re in such dire need of my book. You understand some of my principles, but not all of them, and that’s what gets you into trouble. Again, the longer you wait, the more pain you are going to suffer. But it’s your choice, my friend.

You DIDN’T do all of the right things, Herbie – because you don’t have “The System.” You didn’t have it when you were with Gal, and you didn’t have it with your wife, and now you’re a father of three with no mother in the house (and if your ex-wife has custody, then they have no father in the house or are being raised by another man).

Your problem with Gal wasn’t Interest Level fluctuation. It was that she’s a whack-job. When you go out with someone who’s crazy, you have to stay away from her because she’s dangerous. You’ll fall in love with her and she’ll start acting nuts. Then you’ll waste time trying to figure out her Interest Level, when she’s really just a loon and all she’s going to do is drag you down and hurt your feelings. Is all of this emotional turmoil worth not having my book?

Remember, guys - once you realize she’s nuts, stay away from her.

Hi Atticus,

 

First of all, anytime a woman uses the word “space,” you’re DEAD. And when she utters the word “single,” it’s every bit as bad as the word “space,” and it means that you’re OUT. And in turn it means that her Interest Level has dropped below 50%, which means that there is no recovering.

 

Atticus, the really sad part is that at one time in this relationship, perhaps for a year and a half to two years, Dakota had high Interest Level in you. But due to your deportment, you slowly lowered it. Since I notice that you don’t mention “The System,” you’re not aware of how this process of deterioration works and you don’t even see that it’s going on. If you would have had my book one year before you met Dakota, she would be begging you for babies right now. Instead, like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says, “Just the thought of you touching her makes her skin crawl.”

 

How can you envision a future with Dakota when she doesn’t even want to be in the same room with you? How obvious does she have to make it before you get the drift that you’re not just out, but that you’re COMPLETELY OUT?

 

Dude, Dakota isn’t confused at all – you’re the one who’s confused. She has low Interest Level, you’re out, and you think she has high interest and that you’re still in. That’s why you’re confused – not her.

 

Guy, Dakota doesn’t want you around her family anymore. What’s the point? This thing is over. To you Psych majors, when you lose the girlfriend, you lose the family too. Most guys don’t realize this. What are you going to do, hang around Dakota’s family and show up to her wedding when she marries her real love? So forget her sister and her fiancé. That’s dead, gone, and finished. Sure, they love you – but what good is it when your girlfriend is out of love with you?

 

Dakota’s Facebook posts aren’t mixed signals at all. They are very, very clear signals to you, my friend. They are saying that you are history. And again, why are you going to be friends with a couple related to a woman who dumped you? And you think they’re never going to talk about Dakota with you? Come on, Atticus, how unrealistic can you be?

 

You don’t know what Dakota’s motives are when she contacts you. The only thing you can know for sure is that you’re OUT. You definitely need my book, man. Again, if you’d had “The System,” this disaster never would have happened. But Dakota began to lose interest in you between a year and a half and two years before the breakup, and it slid all the way from 95% to below 50%. And when it hit 49%, she said “I’m out of here!”

 

You can’t approach this situation anymore, Atticus. You have to get my book and memorize it ASAP and find someone new who you haven’t blown it with. The truth is that you’re not rejecting Dakota when you tell her not to contact you because you’re already out.

 

Remember, guys: unless you memorize “The System,” you’ll just repeat the same mistakes with the next woman you meet. 

Hi Garry,

 

As soon as you began having trouble with your wife, you didn’t have “The System” overnighted to you (or buy my immediate downloads - ELECTRONIC SYSTEM or SYSTEM AUDIO). Why not? Do you realize the terrible anguish you could have saved yourself? All that time Donatella’s interest was going from 90%...to 88%...to 85%...to 82%, etc. And as most American men do, you noticed it finally when it hit 60% or 57% or somewhere in that area. “The System” says that this woman probably once loved you. You’ve been with her for 15 years, and she probably loved you for eight to 10 years of that time. After that, because you took her for granted, her Interest Level began to drop.

 

And let me explain something to you. Interest Level doesn’t drop from 100% to 49% in an hour, or overnight, even though that’s the man’s perception of what’s going on. No, like my cousin Rabbi Love says, “It takes time and negligence to erode.” That’s why if you’d have memorized my materials, when it went from 91% to 89% you would have known to start getting into my MAINTENANCE PROGRAM, which will secure the woman wanting to stay with you forever. But like most men in America, you knew how to get her, but you didn’t know how to keep her. That’s why a majority of women recently reported in a national survey that they wouldn’t marry the same guy again. But since you didn’t have my book, what’s happened to you now is predictable.

 

You might have thought this situation was going to improve on its own, Garry, but when Interest Level goes 60%...58%..56%...54%, it’s like an airplane going down. It won’t pull up by itself. Like my cousin General Love says, “It just crashes and burns.” And that’s what happened with your wife. You murdered her Interest Level through your deportment.

 

So when your relationship with Donatella took another dive, why didn’t you Google a love doctor for some advice? The question to ask was, why is this woman so turned off when for eight or 10 years she idolized me? Dude, a good salary and taking care of your family financially doesn’t equate to romance to a female.

 

Your wife had been showing you for a long time that you were miles apart. Did she really have to verbalize it and tell you she no longer loved you? You’ve been with her for a long time, and when she finally said it after a deterioration of five or six years, it was only then that you sat up and took notice? Are you blind? And to you Psych majors, when she tells you that she no longer loves you, you are OUT.

 

Now let me explain something else to you. When Interest Level consistently drops, it’s NEVER temporary. It’s only temporary until she leaves. Then it’s final,

 

Now you’re in a fatal depression, pal. If you’d been studying my book all along, it would have made the pain more bearable. So the first thing you have to do now is have “The System” OVERNIGHTED to you and MEMORIZE it (or get an immediate download - SYSTEM AUDIO or ELECTRONIC SYSTEM). Because when it comes to women, you are absolutely clueless, even after you’ve lived with this woman for so long. Garry, I know more about your wife than you do and I’ve never even met the woman. And that’s very sad.

 

Then, like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says, “You have to suck it up.” When Donatella calls, be polite, don’t talk about your relationship, ask her how much money she needs, send her a check and ask her if there’s anything more you can do for her. Maybe, with time, she’ll meet you for coffee, then maybe a dinner date, then maybe you’ll move into getting her back into the house. Try to talk to your kids as much as possible. You’ll have to apologize for blowing up and making a fool of yourself because when you did that, it only reinforced your wife’s low Interest Level. Because what she said to herself was that she didn’t realize that her husband was so lacking in Self-Control!

 

But no matter what, you still need my book. You need to find out where you went wrong with your wife. Like I said earlier, you’re clueless.

 

Whether or not Donatella has found someone else is beyond your control. So don’t make the problem even worse than it is. Get “The System,” study it like heck, and we’ll do our best to get her back.

 

Donatella didn’t throw away anything over nothing. You stopped romancing your wife and took her for granted. You never told her she was Beautiful. You didn’t treat her like a woman. If you did, she would still be all over you.

 

Remember, guys: to keep your wife in love with you, you have to date her.

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Leave a Reply 6 comments

Anthony - 2 November 2017 Reply

Doc, ive known caprice for awhile we grew up in same church. She recently broke up with her boyfriend. Im going to ask for her number tmrw when i see her in church. I was thinking of taking her out to this sushi restaurant thats like 10 mins from her house. Shes been there before the food is really good etc.. Is that okay for a first date or should i do like a couple games of bowling and then take her to sushi or just sushi? The driving distance between bowling and sushi is like 15 mins i live in long island ny

    DocLove - 4 November 2017 Reply

    Hi Anthony,

    Thanks for reading and writing.

    Time in the car is the enemy early on – try to minimize that. Do one thing each date for the first 3 or 4 dates so sushi would be fine for the first date. You can expand to multiple locations as you get to know her better.

    By the way – if you don’t have http://www.doclove.com/system you should get it before trying with this girl – it will increase your chances.

John - 2 November 2017 Reply

Doc, just wanted to clarify. After she asks to be the girlfriend i have to see her twice a week and wait 3 days to call her not 5 to 9? I heard on your radio show that the rule was changed. Love your book! Thanks

    DocLove - 4 November 2017 Reply

    Hi John,

    Thanks for reading and writing and for the compliment – there is no hard and fast rule when she’s your girlfriend when it comes to calling. Remember when you follow http://www.doclove.com/system that for her to become your girlfriend she has to make it past 10-12 dates with no red flags so you don’t have to have a set # of days between calling. The idea is not to see her 24/7 because she’ll get sick of you but as long as you’re seeing her 2-3 times a week max and you aren’t texting and communicating all the time you should be okay. Remember you can never stop being a CHALLENGE but waiting 3 days to call your girlfriend will aggravate her and drop INTEREST LEVEL so run things looser and relax and enjoy her company!

Jim - 2 November 2017 Reply

Doc, caprice gave me her number 2 years ago but i never asked her out when she was single, i was stupid and i regret not. She just broke up with her long distance boyfriend and has been giving me buying signals again. i was wanting to ask her out. Can i ask for her cell phone number even though she knows i already have it. I was going to ask for her home number as well. Thanks for your help

    DocLove - 4 November 2017 Reply

    Jim, thanks for reading and writing.

    Since you already have the number ask her for a date when you see her. This is not ideal as it’s a clean up case because as you said it was stupid not to close 2 years ago when you had the chance but once you get her out on the date then start being strict with the http://www.doclove.com/system from that point forward

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