SHE'S A GREAT GIRL EXCEPT FOR THAT 'MINOR' TENDENCY TO TALK ABOUT OTHER MEN...UGH
THE SYSTEM says that talking about other men - even if it "seems" innocent is NO GOOD. Read on...
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I’ve been dating Samantha for two years and everything has been truly wonderful. I have followed your program to the letter. The 60 days of Challenge got her hooked, and then came the romance and affection. Samantha treats me like a king. Just the other day she gave me a card with a picture of a baby boy on the front. What she was telling me without coming out and saying it was how she really wants to marry me, and this is what our kid will look like. Now here’s the kicker, Doc. She even put a little money in it for me! She does stuff like this for me all the time. She even paid for my plane ticket to go and see her parents with her this past Christmas.
So what’s my problem? Well, it’s an issue related to Self-Control and jealousy. I know you said that jealousy is an absolute no-no and that guys have to have Self-Control at all times. Here’s what shakes mine.
Every month Samantha has to go out of town for two days to attend a seminar for her job. When she comes back, she tells me about this dude in her program who’s really cool and how they talk and then go out to dinner. Then she goes on to say she finally met someone in her seminar -- meaning him -- who isn't a total jerk (because everyone else in it is arrogant).
Now when she tells me all this, I play it cool. Samantha recounts how she showed my picture to this guy and told him all about how we met, and he in turn talks about his girlfriend.
I told her “That’s great,” but inside I’m thinking that this dude is trying to move in on my girl, know what I mean? Samantha’s actions show that she loves me, but I can’t help but think maybe I’m being hoodwinked here. I mean, how would I really know, right?
So Doc, am I just overanalyzing the situation? Am I being too paranoid? Am I worried over nothing, or am I letting myself get taken for a ride?
Jagger - who feels uneasy about those dinner dates
DOC LOVE'S ANSWER
Very cute, Samantha’s little card with the money stuck in it. And I’ll bet that was a pretty baby on the cover, too. All in all, a very nice scene except for one thing -- she talks to you about another guy? Hold it right there! That’s a big, huge rock in the middle of the road, man. You might think it’s just a ping-pong ball, but from where I’m sitting, it’s a boulder.
I’ve got news for you, Jagger. This dude Samantha’s been talking about has been “working” her. Here’s the scenario. He’s new and fresh, he looks sharp, he has a spiffy suit on, he out dresses everybody at the seminar, he’s coming off as funny as Chris Rock, and, worst of all, you’re not doing something right at home.
Know how I know? Samantha wouldn’t be talking about him otherwise. As my Uncle Jethro Love would say, “When you make the cat purr all the time, she never wants to be petted by anyone else.”
Now let’s take apart what Samantha’s been feeding you about the seminar, piece by piece. Like I always tell you guys, this is the time to be like Detective Green on Law And Order, and you’re going to be a love cop on Love and Order. So run the evidence through your brain: “Now here’s a seminar room containing 38 people, right? And guess what? Every single one of them is ‘arrogant,’ except for this one guy. That leaves 37 arrogant people.”
Does it hold water? Or is...
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