BUILD A RELATIONSHIP ON FACEBOOK? UH, NO...
THE SYSTEM says that there is NOTHING GOOD that is going to come out of trying to build a relationship on social media. Case in point is below...
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I have an interesting situation on my hands. I met Adrienne at a Halloween party two years ago. I immediately started up a chat with her on Facebook and asked if we could add each other. Then I even asked her out.
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Well, she said she was seeing someone, and also that she didn’t want to add me on Facebook because the guy she was dating was getting jealous over the male friends she has on Facebook. So nothing whatsoever happened and I forgot about the whole thing.
I moved on and now, two years later, she wants to friend me on Facebook. I wrote back to her, “Hey, I thought you didn’t want to do this because you have a jealous boyfriend.” She responded with, “He’s still around. We work together but I deleted him as a friend on Facebook and as a boyfriend.” I then wrote back, “You work together? I bet that’s really awkward, LOL!”
Then I asked her if she’d like to get together sometime, and she said, “I work two jobs and my schedule is crazy. But I’m sure I’ll see you around in the future.” Of course I thought to myself, “Yeah, I won’t hold my breath.”
Doc, what would you say Adrienne’s Interest Level is? Do you have any suggestions for what I might do to get her out on a date?
Brutus - who’d like to have a shot at her
DOC LOVE'S ANSWER IN A SECOND BUT FIRST...
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It was a huge mistake to use Facebook with Adrienne. To you Psych majors, you do NOT put any information about yourself on the internet. People are going to see it and make judgments about what you’re doing and they can easily misinterpret what you’re really trying to say. So that was a bad move, pal.
What you should have done instead was asked Adrienne for her phone number, then called her up and asked her out. But you went down a different road: you went for being friends on Facebook. And the danger with that is, like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says, “Once a friend, always a friend.” What you don’t want is to get stranded in the Friend Zone, and Facebook will do that to you.
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And remember that when a girl asks you to be her boyfriend, you have to ask her in return, “Do you have any exes on your Facebook page?” If she says yes I do, you then say “Then let’s just leave it as it is.”
So now, after all this time, Adrienne wants to be your friend on Facebook. You know if you’ve read my book that you can’t go back. So let me get this straight: two years later, out of the blue, all of a sudden Adrienne realized how great you were? Now think about it. She wouldn’t date you two years ago and she wouldn’t even be your friend on Facebook! And now she’s popped up out of nowhere and wants to be your friend? This girl’s a whack-job, dude!
You shouldn’t have brought up her jealous boyfriend when Adrienne contacted you after two years. Now you’re arguing with her, Brutus. Another big mistake. What you should have said instead was...
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Plus you got angry, jealous, uptight boyfriend in the picture still. I’m sure nothing will go wrong there!
HA, great point!