HERE'S A GUY WITH HIS HEAD ON STRAIGHT IN THE DATING GAME
THE SYSTEM says that you have to do everything right and you have to be different if you want a chance with today's woman and while this guy has a question about fine tuning when to call her or not, he's really going in a good direction. Check out what he's doing!
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READER'S QUESTION
Hey Doc,
I bought the “The System” and I read it several times a day. It is teaching me the importance of being a Challenge, specifically that a man should wait five to nine days before calling a woman.
I’m currently in college, and I’m interested in one of the women in my classes. Her name is Monica, and in this class, the professor makes students talk about our reading assignments for 10 minutes. During class, Monica and I talked about the readings. I kept the conversation light and funny. She touched my arm twice and asked me several personal questions. I didn’t touch Monica and kept my answers vague, steering the conversation to be more about her than about me. It says in “The System” that a man shouldn’t touch a woman nor talk about himself when he’s just getting to know her. You also said that even when a woman becomes your girlfriend, the man should still remain a Challenge.
Throughout the lecture Monica was constantly fidgeting and playing with her hair. I didn’t pay attention to her and remained focused on the professor. Before class ended I asked for Monica’s number, which she quickly gave me. This all happened at the Tuesday class, but Monica did not show up for the Thursday class. When should I call her? Should I call her next Monday? If I call her Monday, it would be six days since I asked for her number. Also, would it slay Challenge if I called her Tuesday evening, several hours after class?
Raphael - who’s trying to get it right
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Hi Raphael,
Let me explain something to you. Every guy out there calls a woman within two days of meeting her. But waiting a week to call her reverses the normal course of the relationship. When you wait – while all the other guys are coming in like wolverines that haven’t eaten in a week – you stand out like a sore thumb. Think about it. If Monica gave her number out to three guys that week and two of them already called her, you’re the one she’s thinking about. She’s thinking “Why hasn’t Raphael called?” So you’re rubbing her ego wrong a little bit – and that’s what piques interest, not predictability. You’re not rushing into rejection like all the other guys, and that’s what makes you stand out as different.
The next thing you did, and it was perfect, was NOT touch Monica back. Every other guy would have touched her right back. When you don’t touch her back, she has to wonder why, and that coaxes her into touching you even more. Every other guy would be jumping all over Monica – but not you. And that creates more interest. Good move on your part, Raphael.
WHAT??? YOU didn't sign up for my free 7-day dating course yet? Did you not understand the word FREE?
Yes, you should remain a Challenge even when she becomes your girlfriend. And that means that YOU DON’T TALK ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS. You’re not going to tell her how much you like her. On the contrary, you’re going to show the woman through your actions that you are a gentleman and that you have class.
Usually when a woman plays with her hair, it’s a buying signal, pal. Now, notice that Monica quickly gave you her number? Notice that there was no hesitation whatsoever? Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says, “When the woman hesitates, you’re dead.” But there was no hesitation with Monica, which was a great sign.
These articles give you a lot but there are key elements that you're missing if you don't have
my book
so if you really want to be successful with women you need THE SYSTEM. Still not convinced? Read my "YOU CHANGED MY LIFE" letters.
It’s actually good that Monica didn’t show up for the Thursday class, buddy. Lots of guys, when they have her number, feel they are obligated to ask the woman out. They actually feel uneasy because they have her number and haven’t called her. But don’t get yourself on that guilt trip, which lots of guys are prey to.
When should you call Monica? Five to nine days after you got her number. So Monday is perfect. It wouldn’t slay Challenge if you waited until after the next Tuesday class to call her – it’s still within the five to nine day window. And whether you see her every day in class or once a year in class is not an issue. So far you’re doing everything right, Raphael. So keep reading “The System” every day. That’s what got you here.
Remember, guys: when you wait to call her, it drives her crazy.