Her Mind Leaves You 1st | Doc Love - Dating Advice For Men

Dating Women Advice: Did Seal’s Gut Tell Him To Move On When Heidi Dumped Him?

WHAT'S THE 411 ON THIS ARTICLE?

Remember that she MENTALLY leaves before she PHYSICALLY leaves.

Read on and don't forget to listen to my Dating Women Radio Show EVERY WEDNESDAY at 5:00 p.m. PT / 8:00 p.m. ET

READER'S QUESTION

Hey Doc,

I need coaching.  I just ordered “The System” but need some help right now.

Britney, my girlfriend of seven months, has broken up with me. I could see the signs and would try to get her to open up about our problems, but she wouldn’t go for it. She became less and less available. I was always very attentive to her needs, maybe too much. And I was always available and did nice things to surprise her.

I never really got closure from Britney and she never said that it was over. She just continued to cut me off until I finally said I will give you space. That was six weeks ago. In those six weeks we exchanged a few texts and calls but it was really nothing but small talk. One night she saw me out with another girl and texted me the next day. A few days later we met to talk, and we ended up making out.

Several days later we met again, talked, laughed and kissed with passion. But afterwards she got quiet and said that it wasn’t going to work between us, the make-out sessions meant nothing, and that she didn’t know why she still had emotions for me.

Doc, does Britney need attention or should I just leave her alone? I feel like I’m chasing her. My gut tells me to walk away and move on, but my heart says keep in touch with her and I might still have a shot.

She has now put an ad on an online dating service. I saw it and told her it looked great. But it read like she was desperate to have someone. Is this her way of replacing me because she’s hurting? But she was the one who dumped me! I don’t get it.

Bobo - who is totally confused

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DOC LOVE'S ANSWER

Hi Bobo,

The really unfortunate thing for you is that like most guys, you waited until the last minute to get my book. You read many of my columns online, then, when you ran into a heavy problem, you decided to buy “The System.” But what most guys don’t realize is that my book will GUARANTEE that you DON’T have a problem in the future. To you Psych majors, you need my training BEFORE conditions deteriorate, not when she’s already walking out the door. Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says, “At that point, you’re already dead.”


Now what do you mean that you were attentive to Britney’s needs? Are you her psychiatrist? Are you her girlfriend? Bobo, if you’re playing her shrink, you’re the one with the major problem. To boot, you say you were always available. When you’re always at her beck and call, you’re slaughtering Challenge. You have to keep a slight distance from a babe – that’s what Challenge is. But of course you’re not aware of how Challenge really works and all of its nuances because you don’t have my book yet.


Now let me explain something to you. When a woman’s Interest Level drops from 51% to 49%, she doesn’t leave like a man will when his interest hits the same level. But MENTALLY SHE’S ALREADY OUT of the relationship, and that’s what really counts. The BODY will only leave 10 points later, when her Interest Level falls from 49% to 39%. That’s when she will...

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