She's Moving For A YEAR | Doc Love - Dating Advice For Men

Dating Women Advice: How Would Ansel Elgort Handle A Long Distance Relationship?


Her INTEREST LEVEL in moving to Europe to study is way higher than her INTEREST LEVEL in her boyfriend.  Not good!

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Hey Doc,

I’ve been reading your columns and listening to your radio shows for quite some time and I completely rely on your judgment!

I’ve been dating Abby, an amazing girl, for two and a half years now and we are still very much in love. I am not the type of guy that would immediately say “She’s the one,” and this is mainly due to the fact that I am not quite sure if true love exists. However, Abby makes me believe that true love does exist.

Even so, something has happened that might put an end to our relationship. Abby is moving to Europe for a year to study there. Since Europe is so far away, I am not sure we will be able to meet often and I am afraid that this long distance relationship might ruin us.

We’ve tried to discuss it, but we both get too emotional and always postpone the discussion. I joined an online discussion group where I met many other people going through long distance relationships, and the majority of them ended up separated because it has been too difficult to be without the other person. Only a small portion of the people I’ve spoken to said that the time they’ve spent apart -- in two different cities or countries -- actually made them closer and want to take the next step in their relationship.

Doc, I am really confused because I can’t hear my own thoughts and understand my own feelings right now. I love Abby, but I am also scared.

I would be happy to hear your thoughts on this situation.

Ronnie - who doesn’t know if he can last for a year


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Hi Ronnie,

I don’t believe that you actually do completely rely on my judgment. If you did, you would have gotten your hands on “The System” as soon as you heard about me, and certainly after you’d read one or two of my columns and heard my radio shows. So you’re contradicting yourself here, my friend. You are missing so much of my core philosophy by not having my book that it shows you are operating with only a small percentage of the wisdom you could have when dealing with the opposite sex. It’s a tremendous deficit for you, guy.

When you say that you don’t believe that true love exists, you’re lying to yourself, Ronnie. True love does exist. And you’re scared to death by how much in love with Abby you are. This is the message that’s coming across loud and clear between the lines. So get real, my friend.

If Abby is moving to Europe for a year to study, it means you’re OUT. How are you going to stay close to someone who is 10,000 miles away? You can’t do it, and it’s not going to happen. Think about it:

Abby is going to leave the love of her life for a whole year and take the chance that some other girl might capture you? Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says, “Oh, yeah, this girl is all over you!” The truth is that Abby is the one who doesn’t believe in true love – not you. Think about that, too.

Just the fact that Abby wants to leave you for an entire year – and she made that decision long ago -- shows that you are indeed finished. This girl doesn’t value you. Like my cousin Rabbi Love says, “There are 50,000 colleges in America, and she couldn’t find one to stay near you?”

If you and Abby can’t...

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