SO MANY THINGS WRONG HERE...WHY CAN'T HE SEE IT?
THE SYSTEM says that women help you when they like you, they treat you well when they like you and oh, you can actually see them on a regular basis because they live in your city and NOT another country. Well, my man couldn't get anything going on any of those fronts with this girl!
Read the article below but first we have some audio extras for you:
Dating Women Podcast #138
138: When Dating Women Remember That Wasting Time Online Can Hurt Your Chances With Women – GET IN THE REAL WORLD
Dating Women Radio Show
Call us and listen every Wednesday at 5:00 p.m. PT / 8:00 p.m. ET
855-345-7465 (US Toll Free - lower 48)
646-668-8937 (Alaska, Hawaii, International)
I’m in my early twenties and work in England as a freelance journalist. I study and travel a lot. I met Jewel, who lives in Egypt, while on my travels. For over half a year we’ve been in contact. When we were together she was all over me and wanted to meet me again in Egypt, as I’m going there this summer for a while.
But recently she has shut down and seems distant. I think it’s because I posted a picture of me and a Russian girl on social media (we are just friends and journalist colleagues), but I think Jewel may have gotten jealous even though I explained the situation to her. Soon afterwards, she started telling me about guys who were flirting with her (an obvious attempt to make me jealous). I was a bit distant with her afterwards as I felt it was manipulative and immature. But when I came back to her, she was still a bit off. I want to call her but she uses her university exams as an excuse not to talk. I’m sure she could find time if she really wanted to talk, as she has called me during busy study periods before, and would even insist that I call her. I tried getting her to open up over text, but she refuses to explain what’s wrong.
Since Jewel has not called me I stopped texting her as much, as I don’t want a texting relationship. Three days ago I texted her in a sweet way that I didn’t want text conversations and could only call, and she got annoyed and I haven’t heard from her since.
What do you think I should do to get Jewel to open up to me and be sweet again? This girl is usually really sweet and supportive and otherwise my type, so I would like things to work out.
Wali - who finds it hard to operate from a distance
DOC LOVE'S ANSWER IN A SECOND BUT FIRST...
Right off the bat you have a problem here. You haven’t asked yourself the all-important question: which one of us is going to move? Is Jewel going to relocate to England? Are you moving to Egypt? This girl is in a foreign country. Since you aren’t citizens of each other’s country, you can’t possibly realize what you’re up against here. Jewel would have to move to England and apply to be a citizen for starters, and only then would she would be truly available. Or vice-versa – you’d have to move and do the same. Like my Uncle Jethro Love says, “The odds of this thing working out are just horrible.”
FREE 7 DAY DATING COURSE - YES, FREE: SIGN UP NOW
And now Jewel has shut down and seems distant. So now you have another problem! Besides being in a foreign land, her Interest Level has dropped tremendously. And you shouldn’t be on social media, pal. It just gets you into trouble. Now you have to explain something. Divorce lawyers use social media 40% of the time. People doing the hiring for jobs use social media 40% of the time – and they don’t want to see a prospective employee holding a beer in one hand while his other arm is wrapped around a girl in a bikini. So it can only bring trouble.
If Jewel was telling you about other guys flirting with her, she has no class. You explained that your Russian friend was no big deal, but you put it on social media to begin with, and that was the problem. Now you have to clean something up!
You’re right -- Jewel was manipulative and immature. So drop her! To you Psych majors, when a girl tries to manipulate you or acts immature, it’s a HUGE RED FLAG. Then she went a bit off when you went back to her – so now you have to try to figure something else out! And it’s not as if she lives five miles down the road. What a mess, Wali! Don’t you see it? What are you trying to save here?
Jewel doesn’t want to talk to you, that’s why you’re having all this trouble setting something up. Her Interest Level is LOW – something you never mention, and I doubt you even understand. I see that you don’t have my book, pal. To you Psych majors, until you understand the concept of Interest Level, YOU WILL GET NOWHERE WITH WOMEN.
Think you have what it takes to succeed by just reading these articles? You don't - these articles give you an insight into how I think but you need my book so if you really want to be successful with women you need THE SYSTEM. Still not convinced? Read my "YOU CHANGED MY LIFE" letters.
So Wali, you’ve got huge Red Flags all over the place here, and you don’t even know what a Red Flag is! Like my cousin General Love says, “You think it’s something a soldier in the Red Army carries around.”
And you have to come to grips with the fact that Jewel doesn’t want things to work out. You’re rationalizing her low Interest Level. You’re going down the wrong road because you don’t have my materials memorized.
But you seem to keep wanting to beat a dead horse. Don’t you notice that this girl is not putting any effort into this relationship at all? And that you’re the one doing all the work? Doesn’t that tell you something? And why would you want to be sweet to someone one who has low Interest Level? You should be sweet to someone who is your girlfriend, not to someone who doesn’t give a hoot!
You haven’t heard from Jewel because she doesn’t want to talk on the phone with you. Doesn’t that tell you something else, especially when a girl is in a foreign land? It’s a problem that she’s in another country of course, but that’s not your major problem. Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says, “Your major problem is that this girl doesn’t dig you!”
There’s nothing you can do to make Jewel open up and be sweet – it can’t happen. Write her off now. You might want things to work out, but it’s a two-way street. The problem is that her Interest Level is below 50% and you don’t even see it, even with all the Red Flags waving in the wind.
Remember, guys: when a girl likes you, she’ll help you.