Last week I told you about 3 types of single women to avoid – this week let’s focus on the positive and look for some defining characteristics that you must have for a successful long-term relationship.
A word of caution – if you find a woman with this criteria then you need to be on your game as well because women like this need a guy that is equally as impressive as they are. Fortunately, you have my dating relationship education course called THE SYSTEM to guide you to be the gentleman they want!
#1: Kindness You want your mate to wish you well – and others too. I would describe kind women as “sweet” but not “syrupy” – they are enlightened and adult enough to interact with the world in a way where they are devoid of bitterness and anger – and their disposition makes it easy to be around. However, these ladies are not fools – if you burn them they will be done with you forever. Kindness does not equal weakness – in fact kind women are some of the strongest women on the planet because they don’t spit the world’s ills back at everyone they meet – they operate at a higher level because they can see past themselves to the needs of others.
Would you rather be with someone that is constantly challenging you at every turn because they like to do battle or would you like to be with someone that is serene and supports you? I know what I would like!
#2: Giving Spirit Again, she’s thinking of others – her kind and gentle nature extends to making sure that folks around her are happy by doing little (or sometimes big) things for them. There is just no doubt in your mind as you get to know her that she will step up and be generous with what she has – her time, money, etc. are merely tools she uses to show her love to those in her life.
Contrast her with the woman that figures the world – especially men she dates – owes her something. The taker freaks when she feels that you’re slighting her by not giving her what she perceives that she deserves. The giver thinks of how she can make things better for the people in her life while the taker has an angle and agenda with every encounter.
I don’t care if she’s a highly intelligent supermodel that’s a lot of fun to be around – if she’s a taker then she will wear you out over the long haul and erode your life – always look for a woman that’s a giver and make sure to give equally to her – she deserves it!
#3: Flexibility No one agrees 100% of the time and if you spend enough time with someone then divergent points of view will emerge – you’ll see things different ways. Relationships evolve from the “high” stage where hormones are popping to the “let’s figure out a way to live with each other the next 40 years” stage.
What sustains things once the hormones fade into the background? Flexibility from her – and you is the key. You will certainly have disagreements and each will want their own way from time to time – and that’s healthy – but what if you’re trapped with a woman that will never bend on anything? “You will go to my mother’s every Sunday because she expects it and I don’t care what you have going on” is what a structured/hard headed women will say to you. No debate, no exchange of ideas, no chance of changing her mind. Her world view of relationships is narrow with a list of things that you must do if you really care about her!
Contrast that with the flexible woman that can roll with things – she certainly wants what she wants from time to time (as we all do) but is willing to bend on things because she knows that the overall relationship is the most important thing as opposed to winning skirmishes over sometimes trivial stuff.
When two people can be flexible with each other and meet in the middle then it makes for a much better long-term situation!
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